Good afternoon gentle reader. One of the things that I love most about my duties as a TEARS operative, are the many opportunities we are afforded to think outside of the box and use our imagination. Such one opportunity presented itself to me just an hour or so ago.

I had located the signature of a Kronos in system and decided to pop in for a surprise inspection. As is typically the case with Marauder class ships, he was doing a fair job of cleaning up after himself, but a TEARS operative strives for perfection.

I quickly made short work of the few wrecks and containers that he’d not yet addressed, then for whatever reason he decided to warp off. As there was nothing left for me to assist with at that time, I decided to move on to other endeavors and made a note to check back in with the Kronos later.

After quick and unproductive excursions into the deadspace pockets of 2 Dominix’s, I decided to check on the Kronos. I warp in to see him just re-entering the first pocket himself, so I jump ahead through the acceleration gate and quickly move out of range of the remaining pirate residents to assess the situation. My eye is quickly drawn to the wreck of an Angel Personnel Transport that’s not yet had its cargohold processed. Unfortunately it’s being guarded by a heavy concentration of frigates and cruisers, so I decide to wait for the Kronos to follow me in and draw their fire. I didn’t have to wait long.

As soon as he warped in, I took the gamble that by the time I reached the transport wreck, most of the attention would be on the Kronos. As I closed within 8km of the wreck, a tractor beam took hold and started drawing it into the maw of the beast, so I quickly rescued the Militants from the wreckage and salvaged what I could for good measure. I then find myself targeted by the Kronos, and prepare to exercise the better part of valor (discretion that is, also known as “running away”) should it become necessary. After only a minute or two he drops the lock on me and I see my inbox start flashing with a message from the Kronos pilot. I open it up to see this:

warning
From: Shirase Mei
Sent: 2010.11.21 17:39
To: Dryfty,

First warning if you do something again, you, your corp and alliance will be marked as red and will be added as a KOS

How quaint. Sensing an opportunity here, albeit a small one, I decide to wring as much as I can out of this pilot who seems to think so much of his abilities.

Re: warning
From: Dryfty
Sent: 2010.11.21 17:41
To: Shirase Mei,

All your loot and salvage now belong to me. Have a nice day sir.

The gauntlet has been thrown gentle reader! At this point I decide to quickly deposit that rescued bunch of Militants in a safe place, as I would not needlessly risk their lives should the Kronos get a lucky shot on my Vigil. My above reply was sent as I was returning to his mission. Color me disappointed though with the next reply, shortly followed by the Kronos warping away again.

Re: Re: warning
From: Shirase Mei
Sent: 2010.11.21 17:42
To: Dryfty,

As you wish
Have a good fun

How easily these carebears give up, have a good fun indeed. I think I will. At this point I increased my CSPA charge from its normal 1 isk to the maximum 1 million isk (I tried going higher, but alas, I was not allowed) and then attempted to engage the Kronos with words this time instead of arms. I feel it was a moderate success and deprived Mr. Shirase Mei of 5 million isk before he apparently noticed his deflating wallet and blocked me before I could my latest reply.

From: Dryfty
Sent: 2010.11.21 17:44
To: Shirase Mei,

Just as I thought, another mouthy coward :D No worries, I can clean that out for you no problem. Already have your misison objective anyway ;)

From: Shirase Mei
Sent: 2010.11.21 17:48
To: Dryfty,

Someone who steals others belonging calls someone coward? You’re a one funny guy. I always though that stupid people are funny… Just to let you know… Eve is a game which let’s you kick someones ass in future, also eve is a game of corps and alliances which allows you to not only kick someones ass but also make his life here more than worse… So good luck mate

From: Dryfty
Sent: 2010.11.21 17:49
To: Shirase Mei,

Better men have threatened worse mate, you’ll have to pardon me if Im not exactly terrified by your temper tantrum, but hey. You keep on showing those rats who’s boss eh?

From: Shirase Mei
Sent: 2010.11.21 17:51
To: Dryfty,

Oh gosh did you ever heard about phrase like “Do not underestimate your opponent” ? If you take me as a PvP noob then you’re more than stupid – sorry.

From: Dryfty
Sent: 2010.11.21 17:52
To: Shirase Mei,

Always bet on stupid my friend, and my money’s firmly on you.

From: Shirase Mei
Sent: 2010.11.21 17:54
To: Dryfty,

yeah… and how much money did you get on me? maybe 1mil? … nah not that much… and for 1 mil you’ve made enemies with TnT … gratz

From: Dryfty
Sent: 2010.11.21 17:55
To: Shirase Mei,

I do try, and if I gave a damn I might even care :D That’s the thing with you carebears, always assuming that people you know… care. But please, this is comedy gold, dont stop now. This would be a good time to tell me how you’re going to “crush you with my main” wouldn’t it?

From: Shirase Mei
Sent: 2010.11.21 17:58
To: Dryfty,

Quess who’s the carebear here… Ninjastealer or char that has to get some isk for PvP restock?

From: Dryfty
Sent: 2010.11.21 18:01
To: Shirase Mei,

Yeah, that whole “target, untarget, send whiney evemail” routine really is the hallmark of the PvP Elite. I salute your prowess at internet spaceships. Dont you have a mission to finish? Oh thats right…

From: Shirase Mei
Sent: 2010.11.21 18:05
To: Dryfty,

Well most of you ninja stealers are just a bunch of noobs so you get scared from that. You didn’t – congrats you’re not at the same level as them. Question: I’m wondering how you imagine this “PvP Elite” ? They’re normal people so what’s wrong with mail? I’m affraid I have to say that you never been around much of “them”…

And this is where it ended. I’d worked up an, in my humble opinion, excellent reply only to find myself blocked when I tried to send it. Guess I got him for more than 1mil after all ;)  So, another day, another empty threat from a member/associate of a nullsec Alliance.

Fly safe gentle reader.