Good evening gentle reader!  Another weekend is upon us at last, and I must say it was a busy week indeed.  Spacelanes were patrolled, numerous offenses were investigated, and even a few violators were…  well, violated.   While I had the good fortune to fly with some outstanding operatives, and bring a few criminals to justice, the most satisfying of these began with a somewhat overzealous and loudmouthed Rattlesnake pilot by the name of SovereignTM.

I was merrily making my way through quite the backlog of debris reports with the assistance of undercover operatives Clantyn and Slim Biggins, when I come upon aforementioned loudmouth in a deadspace simply littered with wrecks and other debris.  I of course did what I do best and began removing the offending debris from space, but something told me that the intrepid mission bear did not appreciate my efforts.

[ 2010.12.01 23:54:51 ] SovereignTM > Fag off my wrecks please
[ 2010.12.01 23:55:15 ] Dryfty > I dont see your name on them… oh wait. I do. Oh well
[ 2010.12.01 23:55:33 ] SovereignTM > No problem here, I’ll just pop them
[ 2010.12.01 23:55:46 ] Dryfty > then why so butthurt?
[ 2010.12.01 23:55:52 ] Dryfty > you guys make no sense
[ 2010.12.01 23:56:10 ] Slim Biggins > at least hes thinking about ways to keep the shipping lanes free of deadly space wrecks
[ 2010.12.01 23:56:12 ] SovereignTM > Not “butthurt” just think its a pathetic thing to do
[ 2010.12.01 23:56:37 ] Dryfty > then you should make a donation to the Fraternal Order of Salvagers so we dont have to steal wrecks to feed our families
[ 2010.12.01 23:56:57 ] Slim Biggins > lol
[ 2010.12.01 23:57:14 ] SovereignTM > Or you could just try doing missions yourself
[ 2010.12.01 23:57:28 ] Dryfty > much easier to let you do them for me
[ 2010.12.01 23:57:35 ] Dryfty > its all about efficiency
[ 2010.12.01 23:57:56 ] SovereignTM > Well pretty flippers won’t get anything from me
[ 2010.12.01 23:58:07 ] SovereignTM > Rather pop my wrecks than let people like you have them ^^
[ 2010.12.01 23:58:11 ] Dryfty > and what is a “pretty flipper” I may ask?
[ 2010.12.01 23:58:21 ] Dryfty > a type of dolphin?
[ 2010.12.01 23:58:40 ] SovereignTM > I meant petty actually, my bad
[ 2010.12.01 23:59:17 ] Augum > apologies for ninja’ing your wrecks, but am skint and must raise some funds without the cash to fund a new ship
[ 2010.12.02 00:00:46 ] Dryfty > dont apologize, 90% of these tossers leave them floating in space. They only get butthurt when someone else comes along to get something out of it
[ 2010.12.02 00:01:09 ] SovereignTM > Some of us can afford a Noctis to salvage ourselves
[ 2010.12.02 00:01:30 ] Dryfty > *looks around, doesnt see a Noctis, continues salvaging*

During the course of this exchange I of course continue to salvage wrecks and secure the contents of their cargoholds. First he tries to deter me by shooting the wrecks, but knowing he will just quit if I were to leave and our first duty as TEARS operatives being spacelane safety, I carry on and then double back to the previous pockets to clear up any wrecks I might have missed in my rush to clear the largest obstructions first.

I finish the previous pockets and rejoin the offender who this time decides to target my salvage ship as I continue cleaning up after him. Once caught up I decide to return to station to make some room in my cargohold and then pop over to Dodixie to do a little shopping.

Once my short trip to Dodixie is finished I return to Agra and notice our offender crying out yet again for attention in Local.

[ 2010.12.02 00:22:51 ] SovereignTM > Was it something I said? :)
[ 2010.12.02 00:23:51 ] SovereignTM > Or maybe I scared the little flipper
[ 2010.12.02 00:23:54 ] SovereignTM > Could be it
[ 2010.12.02 00:24:12 ] Dryfty > actually, I took all the Larges and moved on, but Ill be glad to come back shortly
[ 2010.12.02 00:24:38 ] SovereignTM > Unless you want my Rattlesnake up your arse you’d better not ^^
[ 2010.12.02 00:24:55 ] Dryfty > awww now thats no way to make friends and influence people
[ 2010.12.02 00:25:23 ] SovereignTM > Neither if flipping really
[ 2010.12.02 00:26:30 ] Dryfty > I think you also need to lookup the definition of “flipping”, that suggests that Im actually leaving something, which I dont
[ 2010.12.02 00:27:17 ] SovereignTM > I’m not quite sad enough to look up the EVE slang dictionary but the day I am I’ll let you know
[ 2010.12.02 00:29:52 ] Dryfty > well there’s a difference between learning enough to not sound like a retard, and being “sad”
[ 2010.12.02 00:30:16 ] SoraXIII > ^ +1
[ 2010.12.02 00:30:51 ] SovereignTM > Then clearly you need to look up the definition of retard
[ 2010.12.02 00:31:07 ] Dryfty > I did, thats how I ended up in your mission
[ 2010.12.02 00:31:14 ] SoraXIII > you people and your definitions
[ 2010.12.02 00:31:25 ] Slim Biggins > its pronounced ruh tard
[ 2010.12.02 00:31:30 ] SovereignTM > And for someone who uses the term butthurt your hardly one to call me on proper use of grammar
[ 2010.12.02 00:31:31 ] SoraXIII > ^^
[ 2010.12.02 00:32:06 ] Slim Biggins > thats not a word?> shit i use that all the time
[ 2010.12.02 00:33:25 ] SovereignTM > Well its not but I was just pointing out its a pretty bad insult
[ 2010.12.02 00:33:44 ] Dryfty > it would be if it were an insult… its more a “state of mind”
[ 2010.12.02 00:33:53 ] Slim Biggins > ^^
[ 2010.12.02 00:34:03 ] Slim Biggins > i cant really call someone a butthurt now can i?
[ 2010.12.02 00:34:57 ] SovereignTM > I didn’t say that, your still using it as an insult, but you are only a flipper so, what more can be expected
[ 2010.12.02 00:35:09 ] Slim Biggins > whats a flipper?
[ 2010.12.02 00:35:49 ] Slim Biggins > is that like the flappers of years past?
[ 2010.12.02 00:36:45 ] SovereignTM > Heh look at him go, earning his pennies :)
[ 2010.12.02 00:37:50 ] Slim Biggins > just remember pennies add up
[ 2010.12.02 00:38:06 ] TriKamRed > -.-
[ 2010.12.02 00:38:25 ] Ustrello > awww..
[ 2010.12.02 00:38:29 ] SovereignTM > And the little flipper flys away
[ 2010.12.02 00:38:41 ] Dryfty > well I cant tank the mission for you forever
[ 2010.12.02 00:38:43 ] Ustrello > hit the second gate like three times
[ 2010.12.02 00:39:05 ] SovereignTM > Not my fault if you stupidly piss off a group is it :L
[ 2010.12.02 00:39:40 ] Dryfty > still 21 Armor Plates richer, so I count it as a win
[ 2010.12.02 00:40:12 ] Slim Biggins > i still like the tripped power circuits
[ 2010.12.02 00:40:24 ] Ustrello > surely you cant be serious dry
[ 2010.12.02 00:40:24 ] Dryfty > 70 of those \o/
[ 2010.12.02 00:40:34 ] Slim Biggins > i find they drop more than plates
[ 2010.12.02 00:41:16 ] SovereignTM > Lol if thats what motivates you to play everyday your a very lonely person Dry :)
[ 2010.12.02 00:43:30 ] Slim Biggins > what motivates you to play sov?
[ 2010.12.02 00:43:47 ] Slim Biggins > i have to say salvaging is much more interesting than mining
[ 2010.12.02 00:44:00 ] Slim Biggins > to me that is the most mind numbing task ever
[ 2010.12.02 00:44:03 ] Dryfty > meh
[ 2010.12.02 00:44:09 ] Dryfty > I am disappoint.
[ 2010.12.02 00:44:11 ] Ustrello > can i make it in time
[ 2010.12.02 00:44:14 ] Ustrello > dun dun dun dun
[ 2010.12.02 00:44:40 ] Ustrello > weeeeeeeeeee

The latter portion of the above log is where it starts to get interesting. I warped back to the Rattlesnake and continued where I’d left off, salvaging what he’d killed (and not shot, just as I suspected). I soon noticed a Hurricane appear on scan, but wasn’t terribly concerned as we were 4 gates into Angel’s Extravaganza, so I knew I had a bit of time. I simply kept a respectable distance from the warpin, which wasn’t hard as the Rattler had moved 50km off and his wrecks followed. Soon enough the valiant White Knight™ Ustrello appears on grid some 40km away and quickly targets my Vigil. Being somewhat familiar with the Hurricane myself (see my collected works for references), I quickly determine that he’s carrying only short range weaponry so I primarily concern myself with staying well out of point range while I determine just how big a mistake our hero is going to make.

Here their Corporation has about 8 minutes left in which to destroy my ship for taking their hard-won salvage, and I have a Rattlesnake and Hurricane targeting me but unwilling to pull the trigger… or so it would seem. To nudge them in the proper direction, I align to station from a vector that puts me on a slow approach towards the Hurricane who has been burning towards me since entering the pocket. As I align I disable my afterburner and just barely keep myself at 30km, outside T2 Disruptor range if he doesn’t overheat. My hunch was correct and I remained unpointed. The “can I make it in time?” question in Local was asked as I began to align, so I had a good feeling about my chances of getting shot at.

Suddenly Success.

He deploys a flight of Warrior II’s and sends them in, firing a hopeful volley from his autocannons as the drones near their range. I wait for the Drones to score a first volley on my shields before warping out to be certain of the effect. This all happens in the course of 3-4 seconds and the Rattlesnake did not fire. Oh well, sometimes you have to settle for bringing in the little fish to keep from starving, even if it means spooking the big fish.

Remember there are 3 members of this Corporation in system now gentle reader, and one has committed a violent act upon my ship and my person. As I queue up the pod transfer from my Vigil to my Hurricane in station, I notice Ustrello docking. My heart sinks at once, just knowing that I’ve lost the opportunity to bring this particular criminal to justice, only to soar moments later when he undocks and I receive notice from Clantyn and Slim that he’s sitting outside the station in the undocking lane along with another Corpmate in a Hurricane.

Finally sitting in my own Hurricane, I decide to wait out the 6 minutes left on their Corporate timer and engage Ustrello once his friends are unable to assist. I realize the possibility of the other Hurricane pilot having Logistic modules fit, so I have some assistance of my own on standby in the form of Slim’s Exequror. Slim does his part by keeping them distracted in Local, and Clantyn brings out a Kestrel and begins bumping Ustrello away from the station. I’m taking one shot at this arrest, and I detest playing station games.

I time my undock to coincide with the expiration of the Corp timer in the hope of catching the other Hurricane with a CONCORDOKKEN, and quickly lock Ustrello, deploy drones, and engage. I slam on the warp disruptor and stasis web to prevent any attempt at escape, and quickly burn into a close orbit laying into his shields with volley after volley. I’m surprised he doesn’t already have his own drones out, and my fingers hover over the targeting console waiting to lock them once they deploy, but I’m left waiting. In fact, as I break his shields and start drilling rounds into the ships armor, I notice that I haven’t even been targeted yet.

Ustrello finally wakes up, targets me, and returns fire as he hits approximately 85% armor and out come his own drones. At first my instinct is to neutralize the opposing Warrior II’s, but I focus on the Hurricane and continue melting it where it lay. I experience a brief flash of panic as my own shields dissipate in 4-5 volleys before realizing that this is an armor tanked Hurricane that I simply haven’t flown in some time. It doesn’t even have T2 guns.

Occupants of the Agrallarier Astral Mining Inc. Refinery were treated to quite the fireworks show as Ustrello’s Hurricane went up in glorious flames.

Here’s the logs of where he realizes what’s happening, and Corpmate BlackTalon07 just sits and watches his friend take it.

[ 2010.12.02 00:53:46 ] Ustrello > opps
[ 2010.12.02 00:53:49 ] Ustrello > scaredd me
[ 2010.12.02 00:54:02 ] BlackTalon07 > lol i shit myself a little
[ 2010.12.02 00:54:06 ] BlackTalon07 > jk lol
[ 2010.12.02 00:54:11 ] Ustrello > damn targeting…
[ 2010.12.02 00:54:57 ] Ustrello > oh noes
[ 2010.12.02 00:55:08 ] BlackTalon07 > damn…
[ 2010.12.02 00:55:12 ] Dryfty > gf
[ 2010.12.02 00:55:14 ] Slim Biggins > surprise!
[ 2010.12.02 00:55:17 ] Ustrello > hehe wasent paying attention
[ 2010.12.02 00:55:37 ] Slim Biggins > you scared me ust i wasnt either
[ 2010.12.02 00:55:47 ] Slim Biggins > i saw the fight and figured you were mean so the other guy gets the reps
[ 2010.12.02 00:55:49 ] Ustrello > station lied to me saying its a not a kick out
[ 2010.12.02 00:56:10 ] Slim Biggins > see what happens when you dont tell people whats going on :)
[ 2010.12.02 00:56:16 ] Ustrello > eh idc
[ 2010.12.02 00:56:18 ] Ustrello > its a game
[ 2010.12.02 00:56:25 ] Clantyn > \o/
[ 2010.12.02 00:56:30 ] Dryfty > either way, gf man :D
[ 2010.12.02 00:56:35 ] Ustrello > not really lol
[ 2010.12.02 00:56:40 ] Ustrello > wasent paying attentipon
[ 2010.12.02 00:56:41 ] Slim Biggins > stickem up?
[ 2010.12.02 00:56:47 ] Ustrello > attention
[ 2010.12.02 00:56:55 ] Slim Biggins > lols
[ 2010.12.02 00:56:59 ] SovereignTM > Neut repping is also considered faggy
[ 2010.12.02 00:56:59 ] Ustrello > by the time i switched targets i was dead
[ 2010.12.02 00:57:07 ] Ustrello > /emote shurgs
[ 2010.12.02 00:57:10 ] Slim Biggins > but legal
[ 2010.12.02 00:57:13 ] Ustrello > shurgs?
[ 2010.12.02 00:57:15 ] Slim Biggins > and to the victors go the spoils
[ 2010.12.02 00:57:37 ] Dryfty > honestly I didnt need the reps, had a pretty good headstart
[ 2010.12.02 00:57:43 ] Ustrello > lol yeah you did
[ 2010.12.02 00:57:59 ] Ustrello > would of been interesting if you didnt have the nuet rep and we both started the same
[ 2010.12.02 00:58:06 ] SovereignTM > Surprising you can fly anything other than your little Vigil really
[ 2010.12.02 00:58:14 ] Dryfty > we’re just full of surprises
[ 2010.12.02 00:58:40 ] Slim Biggins > the battle vigil will not be talked about like that
[ 2010.12.02 00:58:46 ] Ustrello > the one time i forgot my ecm drones
[ 2010.12.02 00:58:47 ] Ustrello > lol
[ 2010.12.02 00:58:48 ] Slim Biggins > it is a noble garbage collection vessel
[ 2010.12.02 00:58:49 ] Ustrello > could of helped
[ 2010.12.02 00:59:17 ] SovereignTM > Heh well another example of not fighting fair
[ 2010.12.02 00:59:29 ] Dryfty > alls fair in love and internet spaceships

An example has been made gentle reader, and another criminal has learned that there are consequences for every action. Standing against law, order, and TEARS has harsh and immediate repercussions my friends, so fly smart and stand alongside us.